Finding the Balance: Parenthood and Marriage

Finding the balance: parenthood and marriageBalancing parenting and a relationship/marriage can be challenging, particularly if you’re feeling the demands of both. Nurturing one while neglecting the other can lead to long-term damage and feelings of guilt. Knowing how to be a parent and partner at the same time, while still finding time for yourself, is important for personal happiness, growth and success. If you’re looking to find ways to balance marriage and parenting try the following steps.

Take charge when it comes to creating a balance between your children and spouse. Schedule time with your children and your partner and add it to the family calendar.  Include activities, dates and actual events. This way, you’re committing yourself.

  1. Plan family time. Spend time with your children and partner. This time is not the usual time that you’re together, but an organized activity, day or event.
  2. Organize your day so you have time for your partner and children. Schedule your kids’ bedtime at a reasonable hour, and make it stick! You and your spouse can take turns being involved in the bedtime ritual. After the children are in bed, you and your other half have private time where you can connect and talk and just “be together”, without distractions.  Take advantage of this time.
  3. Talk with your partner and share your desire to have a better partner-parenting balance. Ask your partner to help you come up with some ideas. This way, your spouse will feel involved and motivated to help take the load off you directly.
  4. Find time for you. You need time to recharge. You can’t give yourself completely to your spouse and children if you don’t have any energy and feel overwhelmed. Giving yourself a chance to recharge will also give your other half an opportunity to spend some time alone or with the kids.
  5. Date night – bring SEXY back! Plan a date at least once a month. This gives you and your honey something to look forward too. Be sure not to put all the planning onus on yourself, plan together or take turns planning the date to add more excitement.  This is the time to take off the track pants, let the hair down and bring your sexy back (pre-mommy style).

“Your children will become what you are; so be what you want them to be” – David Bly

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